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Theresa Ruth Howard Dancer/Writer/Teacher Theresa Ruth Howard began her professional dance career with the Philadelphia Civic Ballet Company at the age of twelve. Later she joined the Dance Theatre of Harlem where she had the opportunity to travel extensively throughout the United States, Europe and Africa. She has worked with choreographer Donald Byrd as a soloist in his staging of New York City Opera's Carmina Burana, his critically acclaimed Harlem Nutcracker, as well as the controversial domestic violence work The Beast. She was invited to be a guest artist with Complexions: A Concept in their 10th anniversary season. In 2004 she became a founding member of Armitage Gone! Dance. As a writer Ms. Howard has contributed to Russell Simmons’ One World magazine (art), and The Source (social politics), as well as Pointe and Dance Magazine. While teaching in Italy for the International Dance Association she was asked to become a contributor for the premiere Italian dance magazine Expressions. Her engaging, no nonsense writing style caught the eye of both the readers of Dance Magazine and its Editor in Chief who not only made her a contributing editor and has collaborated with Ms. Howard in See and Say Web-reviews. Her articles about body image prompted her to develop a workshop for young adult (dancers and non-dancers) My Body My Image that addresses their perceptions both positive and negative about their bodies and endeavoring to bring them closer to a place of Acceptance and Appreciation. She recently launched a blog by the same name to reach a broader audience (mybodymyimage.com) As a teacher Ms. Howard has been an Artist in Residence at Hollins University in and New Haven University in addition to teaching at Sarah Lawrence College, Marymount, Shenandoah, and Radford Universities, and the historical American Dance Festival. As a result of her work at ADF Ms. Howard was invited to Sochi, Russia to adjudicate the arts competition Expectations of Europe and teach master classes, and in Burundi, Africa where she coached and taught the Burundi Dance Company. Currently she on faculty at The Ailey School but also extensively throughout Italy and Canada. Ms. Howard's belief in the development, and nurturing of children lead her to work with at risk youth. At the Jacob Riis Settlement House in Queensbridge New York, she founded S.I.S.T.A (Socially Intelligent Sisters Taking Action) a mentoring program for teen-age girls where she worked to empower them to become the creators of their destinies. In addition she developed a dance program, which lead to an exchange with the Dance Theatre of Harlem. Through her teaching and travels Ms. Howard began to observe a universal disenchantment and disconnection in teenagers that disturbed her, thus she set out to address it. Combining her philosophies of life and teaching, with the skills she garnered through outreach programs with diverse communities, she developed the personal development workshop Principles of Engagement: Connecting Youth to the Infinite Possibilities Within which gives teens a set of workable tools to increase their levels of success at tasks, and goals not only in dance, and all aspect of their lives. Theresa Ruth Howard is certainly diverse and multifaceted as an artist, and is moved to both write and create work; however she sees every student she encounters as a work in progress, and the potential to change the world one person at a time. The only was to make this world a better place it to be better people in it!

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Beyonce is not a Feminist, but an Entertainer, there is only on God, Fame

 

BellBey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They say bad things come in threes and it seems that Carter’s have had two hits of late, the Solange elevator beat down of Jay-Z being the latest, and the first was feminist writer bell hooks calling the Queen B, a terrorist because of the over sexualized images she projects to young women. It all transpired at the New School during a panel discussion entitled “Are You Still a Slave?”. The group, which included filmmaker Shola Lynch, author Marci Blackman, feminist icon and scholar bell hooks, and activist and author Janet Mock. The talk focused on the images of women of color in the media and the types of messages that are sent to the public at large. When author Janet Mock, a transgendered activist and author wanted to discuss how inspirational she found Beyoncé’s new album Partition to be when writing her own book, Mock lauded the singer for ‘owning her body and claiming that space.’ It was then that the venerable feminist took issue with Mrs. Carter and unleashed her thoughts about the often scantily clad “drunken love” singer:

“I see a part of Beyoncé that is in fact anti-feminist — that is a terrorist, especially in terms of the impact on young girls. I actually feel like the major of assault on feminism in our society has come from visual media, and from television, and videos. Just think, do we know of any powerful man of any color who’s come out with some tirade against feminism? The tirades against feminism occur so much in the image-making business, and what we see.

What I’m concerned about constantly in my critical imagination is why don’t we have libratory images that are away from, not an inversion of, what society has told us?”

Of course that started the firestorm that was only slightly quelled by Solange’s buck wild attack on Mr. Carter at the Met Gala on May 4th. Some people might tie both incidents together using the fact that Beyoncé stood virtually idly by as her baby sister took it to her man in Love and Hip Hop style arguing that she was being submissive by holding her place and not getting involved…or it could be said that Jay did some dirt that Solange was privy too having had enough lashed out in protection of her sister. If (and this is all predicated the over heated gossip mill at work) there was some impropriety and Solange was taking the matter in hand because her sister was unwilling or un able to stand up for herself, then the feminists would have a field day with that…however we do not know what the cause of such rage and enmity, but I will take on what Ms. Hooks was referencing, the images that Beyoncé put out into the world that might be considered anti-feminist …

beyonc-and-jay-z-owned-the-grammy-stage-performing-drunk-in-love

When Partition hit the world like the meteor that rendered the dinosaurs extinct and Beyoncé stated that considered this her “feminist” album, while admitting to researching feminism on “YouTube” I had a eye roll that left me crossed-eyed, she opened herself up to such scrutiny from the likes of hooks. The whole situation got me to thinking. I had ask myself “Do I consider Beyoncé a feminist? Then there was the Grammy performance that featured the Carters “drunk in love”, and Beyoncé on sexual hyper-dive. In case you are living under a rock, she wore black T-back briefs and jeweled black bando under a shear long sleeved black leotard under ribbed cut out corset over lay. It was hot, she looked hot as she “smized” slinked and slithered stripper style, legged spread eagle over a chair in the opening. The thin strip of crotch on her leotard held on for dear life, otherwise we would have see Blue Ivy private exit door! She delivered the sexy; she delivered the ass shaking, albeit via a track (for the most part). Personally I was shocked at how thin she was. Not skinny, I mean she will always have some meat on her bones but her legs were so thin. I suppose that was the result of her 22-day Vegan (while wearing fur) diet. Some were disappointed wanting the high energy, high voltage Bey, with the long legged stage strut, back up dancers, long wig whipping and the crazy bouncy eyes, others (probably straight men and some women) sat mouth agape trying to stifle the tingles that you get when watching the set up to a porn video. But hey! Put that thing away, this is a family show…or is it?

The Internet blew up; one of the topics that was reignited was the idea of this being the new “feminist” Beyoncé. Some argued that the hyper-sexuality was not in keeping with feminism, others argued that it, the performance and performer were indeed a self empowered, self possessed woman in charge of her sexuality…Ok I can see both sides but when Jay-Z pranced out and delivered the lines

I’m Ike Turner, turn up, baby, no, I don’t play
Now eat the cake, Anna Mae said, “Eat the cake, Anna Mae!”

 

Now for those of you who are not aware Anna Mae (Bullock) is the Tina Turner’s birth name, the reference was to a scene in the bio-pic What’s Love Got to do With It? In the scene Tina is being praised and Ike smashes cake in her face… it was a reference from an episode in an abusive relationship, an infamously abusive relationship. For a man, (a husband), to sing that, to a woman (his wife), and for her to sing along… I’m not sure how I feel about that…. Perhaps it is to be taken as mere role-play, hey we all have been there, some of our sexual fantasies are fantasies, however some should not be made public…even to your GG. Sometimes when you know what people do in private, it makes you think of them differently. But either way, something like this gives the impression that some how, and in some context, both Jay-Z and Beyoncé both are condoning physical abuse…. Insert picture of Rhianna’s battered face “Eat cake Anna Mae”

 

*Personally I think it is unacceptable and inexcusable, and if anyone cares, it is at the very least a bad example.

 

When her latest album hit the world like the meteor that killed all the dinosaurs, and the feminist buzz began, it got me to thinking. I had ask myself, “Do I consider Beyoncé a feminist? Does she in my opinion embody feminist ideas, and principles? I was left at a moral stalemate until what I am calling GrammyGate. Then eureka! The answer was a clear as day. I think that Madonna’s appearance during Macalroy’s performance help my to solidify my theory. Here is it:

Beyoncé is neither animal, vegetable, mineral nor feminist. She is an Entertainer she has no religion, she worships at the temple of fame and notoriety. She was raised in the church of the entertainment business, raised in its culture, and her values and morals have been shaped by its doctrine. Her parents had a master plan, kudos to them for setting their daughter up to dominate not merely the world stage, but the World at Large. Much like Richard Williams, father of tennis pros Venus and Serena, Papa Williams declared that this girls would be number 1 and they were, people thought he was crazy, and he was, like a fox. The Knowles had a similar plan for their firstborn. As similar as the situations might be, the world of sports is vastly different then the world entertainment. In Sports, it’s about wins, losses and rankings, the rules are clear-cut the person with the most points wins. In the Entertainment industry, success, or being “number one” it’s based on things that are both factual (profits, sales, Platinum records, box-office sales, ratings, etc.) and the ephemeral (bankability, popularity, visibility, buzz, hype, gossip) both are things that can be bought, manipulated and skewed. It’s far more mercurial equation then putting a ball in a hoop.

The entertainment industry is a Church that built on smoke and mirrors, and optical illusions are par for the course. Illusions are its corner stone, illusions of body, illusions of the talent, illusions of an artist’s whole private life if necessary. If a performer enters the Church of the Entertainer but is unwilling to be a part of the magic act, it can directly affect their level of success. Success in the Church can hinge on a myriad of things that have nothing to do with your talent or the quality of the by-product of it. “Success” can live or die on how much skin you are willing to show, who you date, who you know, who you have sex with, who you had sex with and if it was caught on tape. It can hinge on what a person is willing to do, how far they are are willing to go… and *that can be a broad list. At times an artist’s beliefs or values can impede what could be a meteoric rise, and if you want it, you have to relinquish belief in all other things and cleave solely unto it.

Madonna-her-son-David-dressed-up-twins-Grammys

The Church of the Entertainer (COE) has large congregation, larger than Scientology. Time after time we see its members doing more and more salacious and ridiculous things in an effort to create visibility, buzz, to as they say in the industry “stay relevant” Madonna is the high priestess of the Church of Entertainment. In the eighties she re-wrote the doctrine. From her multiple re-incarnations, cultural appropriation, sexual exploits and outlandish statements, she has managed to keep us intrigued or at least guessing for the last 30 years. Recently she was raising Cain with her tweet of N-word towards her “white” son, and then as a buffer trotted her African son out to the Grammys in matching pimp outfits wearing gold and diamond grills… Then she performed with Miley Cyrus, bumping and grinding and sticking her tongue out like a tween. Perhaps this would be considered unacceptable behavior for your average 55 year-old woman, but its quite common for and entertainer. As always she left us not quite knowing how to feel about what we just saw, but for different reasons then in her early years. This time we were less intrigued and titillated but more disturbed and perplexed. *“Why would she that? She’s Madonna, she’s above that”, we ask. And the fact that we are questioning is the very reason she is so successful. It’s not always about being liked, being reviled can have just as many dividends as being the “Sweetheart”. In the C.O.E the doctrine tells us that it we must not only get people talking but keep them talking, it matters little if it is positive or negative. There is no such thing as bad press.

As an outsider to the Church of Entertainment, if you don’t understand what you are looking at, you might think that what you are witnessing is a contradiction. You might think that Madonna adopting an African child and then using the N-word is contradictory…you might think it is a contradiction to call your album “feminist” and then allow your husband to spit a domestic violence reference at you as you shake you scantily clad ass, and telling other “Bitches” to “Bow down” but they are not, they are completely in keeping with the practice of the Church. They are actions that have payoff in controversy, which equals press and translates into money and metabolizes into power…

There is no shame In the C.O.E, there is only shame in “falling off”, fading. There is no compunction in the C.O.E. you can appropriate, you can out and out steal other artists’ work (as long as you have enough money silence or fight the law suit) there is not loyalty, there can be love, as long as it is with a standing member of the Church, or one that has no association with the Church but is allowing of its practices. The only expectation that you can have from a member is that you will be Entertained. You have not right to hold them to what they say today, whether it’s practicing a religion, supporting a foundation, charity or cause, even their rehabilitation or sobriety is up for grabs. With the mercurial shifts of the industries winds, boundaries, loyalties and values change with swift regularity. Just when we think we identify with them, that in some way they represent us, they shift and change. We then feel betrayed, having bought into what they were presenting, we believed them… that is because we are outsiders and we don’t know the rules of operation within the Church.

Make no mistake about it, Beyoncé is all about being the biggest, baddest, B on the planet. There is little she wouldn’t do to become that (which she has) or to maintain that. That is what the religion of Fame requires. Beyoncé is not a feminist, the laws of the Church that she serves will never allow her to prescribe to feminism or any other group, she can feign allegiance, or service, she can manipulate it, but in the Church of The Entertainer the doctrine is clear, “Thy shall serve no other God but Fame”.

Beyoncé..not a Feminist but an Entertainer, there is only on God…Fame

 

BellBey

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They say bad things come in threes and it seems that Carter’s have had two hits of late, the Solange elevator beat down of Jay-Z being the latest, and the first was feminist writer bell hooks calling the Queen B, a terrorist because of the over sexualized images she projects to young women. It all transpired at the New School during a panel discussion entitled “Are You Still a Slave?”. The group, which included filmmaker Shola Lynch, author Marci Blackman, feminist icon and scholar bell hooks, and activist and author Janet Mock. The talk focused on the images of women of color in the media and the types of messages that are sent to the public at large. When author Janet Mock, a transgendered activist and author wanted to discuss how inspirational she found Beyoncé’s new album Partition to be when writing her own book, Mock lauded the singer for  ‘owning her body and claiming that space.’ It was then that the venerable feminist took issue with Mrs. Carter and unleashed her thoughts about the often scantily clad “drunken love” singer:

“I see a part of Beyoncé that is in fact anti-feminist — that is a terrorist, especially in terms of the impact on young girls. I actually feel like the major of assault on feminism in our society has come from visual media, and from television, and videos. Just think, do we know of any powerful man of any color who’s come out with some tirade against feminism? The tirades against feminism occur so much in the image-making business, and what we see.

What I’m concerned about constantly in my critical imagination is why don’t we have libratory images that are away from, not an inversion of, what society has told us?”

Of course that started the firestorm that was only slightly quelled by Solange’s buck wild attack on Mr. Carter at the Met Gala on May 4th.  Some people might tie both incidents together using the fact that Beyoncé stood virtually idly by as her baby sister took it to her man in Love and Hip Hop style arguing that she was being submissive by holding her place and not getting involved…or it could be said that Jay did some dirt that Solange was privy too having had enough lashed out in protection of her sister. If (and this is all predicated the over heated gossip mill at work) there was some impropriety and Solange was taking the matter in hand because her sister was unwilling or un able to stand up for herself, then the feminists would have a field day with that…however we do not know what the cause of such rage and enmity, but I will take on what Ms. Hooks was referencing, the images that Beyoncé put out into the world that might be considered anti-feminist …

beyonc-and-jay-z-owned-the-grammy-stage-performing-drunk-in-love

When Partition hit the world like the meteor that rendered the dinosaurs extinct and Beyoncé stated that considered this her “feminist” album, while admitting to researching feminism on “YouTube” I had a eye roll that left me crossed-eyed, she opened herself up to such scrutiny from the likes of hooks.  The whole situation got me to thinking. I had ask myself “Do I consider Beyoncé a feminist? Then there was the Grammy performance that featured the Carters “drunk in love”, and Beyoncé on sexual hyper-dive. In case you are living under a rock, she wore black T-back briefs and jeweled black bando under a shear long sleeved black leotard under ribbed cut out corset over lay. It was hot, she looked hot as she “smized” slinked and slithered stripper style, legged spread eagle over a chair in the opening. The thin strip of crotch on her leotard held on for dear life, otherwise we would have see Blue Ivy private exit door! She delivered the sexy; she delivered the ass shaking, albeit via a track (for the most part). Personally I was shocked at how thin she was. Not skinny, I mean she will always have some meat on her bones but her legs were so thin. I suppose that was the result of her 22-day Vegan (while wearing fur) diet. Some were disappointed wanting the high energy, high voltage Bey, with the long legged stage strut, back up dancers, long wig whipping and the crazy bouncy eyes, others (probably straight men and some women) sat mouth agape trying to stifle the tingles that you get when watching the set up to a porn video. But hey! Put that thing away, this is a family show…or is it?

The Internet blew up; one of the topics that was reignited was the idea of this being the new “feminist” Beyoncé. Some argued that the hyper-sexuality was not in keeping with feminism, others argued that it, the performance and performer were indeed a self empowered, self possessed woman in charge of her sexuality…Ok I can see both sides but when Jay-Z pranced out and delivered the lines

I’m Ike Turner, turn up, baby, no, I don’t play
Now eat the cake, Anna Mae said, “Eat the cake, Anna Mae!”

 

Now for those of you who are not aware Anna Mae (Bullock) is the Tina Turner’s birth name, the reference was to a scene in the bio-pic What’s Love Got to do With It? In the scene Tina is being praised and Ike smashes cake in her face… it was a reference from an episode in an abusive relationship, an infamously abusive relationship. For a man, (a husband), to sing that, to a woman (his wife), and for her to sing along… I’m not sure how I feel about that…. Perhaps it is to be taken as mere role-play, hey we all have been there, some of our sexual fantasies are fantasies, however some should not be made public…even to your GG. Sometimes when you know what people do in private, it makes you think of them differently. But either way, something like this gives the impression that some how, and in some context, both Jay-Z and Beyoncé both are condoning physical abuse…. Insert picture of Rhianna’s battered face “Eat cake Anna Mae”

 

*Personally I think it is unacceptable and inexcusable, and if anyone cares, it is at the very least a bad example.

 

When her latest album hit the world like the meteor that killed all the dinosaurs, and the feminist buzz began, it got me to thinking. I had ask myself, “Do I consider Beyoncé a feminist? Does she in my opinion embody feminist ideas, and principles? I was left at a moral stalemate until what I am calling GrammyGate. Then eureka! The answer was a clear as day. I think that Madonna’s appearance during Macalroy’s performance help my to solidify my theory. Here is it:

Beyoncé is neither animal, vegetable, mineral nor feminist. She is an Entertainer she has no religion, she worships at the temple of fame and notoriety. She was raised in the church of the entertainment business, raised in its culture, and her values and morals have been shaped by its doctrine. Her parents had a master plan, kudos to them for setting their daughter up to dominate not merely the world stage, but the World at Large. Much like Richard Williams, father of tennis pros Venus and Serena, Papa Williams declared that this girls would be number 1 and they were, people thought he was crazy, and he was, like a fox.  The Knowles had a similar plan for their firstborn. As similar as the situations might be, the world of sports is vastly different then the world entertainment. In Sports, it’s about wins, losses and rankings, the rules are clear-cut the person with the most points wins. In the Entertainment industry, success, or being “number one” it’s based on things that are both factual (profits, sales, Platinum records, box-office sales, ratings, etc.) and the ephemeral (bankability, popularity, visibility, buzz, hype, gossip) both are things that can be bought, manipulated and skewed. It’s far more mercurial equation then putting a ball in a hoop.

The entertainment industry is a Church that built on smoke and mirrors, and optical illusions are par for the course. Illusions are its corner stone, illusions of body, illusions of the talent, illusions of an artist’s whole private life if necessary. If a performer enters the Church of the Entertainer but is unwilling to be a part of the magic act, it can directly affect their level of success. Success in the Church can hinge on a myriad of things that have nothing to do with your talent or the quality of the by-product of it. “Success” can live or die on how much skin you are willing to show, who you date, who you know, who you have sex with, who you had sex with and if it was caught on tape. It can hinge on what a person is willing to do, how far they are are willing to go… and *that can be a broad list. At times an artist’s beliefs or values can impede what could be a meteoric rise, and if you want it, you have to relinquish belief in all other things and cleave solely unto it.

Madonna-her-son-David-dressed-up-twins-Grammys

The Church of the Entertainer (COE) has large congregation, larger than Scientology.  Time after time we see its members doing more and more salacious and ridiculous things in an effort to create visibility, buzz, to as they say in the industry “stay relevant” Madonna is the high priestess of the Church of Entertainment. In the eighties she re-wrote the doctrine. From her multiple re-incarnations, cultural appropriation, sexual exploits and outlandish statements, she has managed to keep us intrigued or at least guessing for the last 30 years. Recently she was raising Cain with her tweet of N-word towards her “white” son, and then as a buffer trotted her African son out to the Grammys in matching pimp outfits wearing gold and diamond grills… Then she performed with Miley Cyrus, bumping and grinding and sticking her tongue out like a tween. Perhaps this would be considered unacceptable behavior for your average 55 year-old woman, but its quite common for and entertainer. As always she left us not quite knowing how to feel about what we just saw, but for different reasons then in her early years. This time we were less intrigued and titillated but more disturbed and perplexed. *“Why would she that? She’s Madonna, she’s above that”, we ask. And the fact that we are questioning is the very reason she is so successful. It’s not always about being liked, being reviled can have just as many dividends as being the “Sweetheart”. In the C.O.E the doctrine tells us that it we must not only get people talking but keep them talking, it matters little if it is positive or negative. There is no such thing as bad press.

As an outsider to the Church of Entertainment, if you don’t understand what you are looking at, you might think that what you are witnessing is a contradiction. You might think that Madonna adopting an African child and then using the N-word is contradictory…you might think it is a contradiction to call your album “feminist” and then allow your husband to spit a domestic violence reference at you as you shake you scantily clad ass, and telling other “Bitches” to “Bow down” but they are not, they are completely in keeping with the practice of the Church. They are actions that have payoff in controversy, which equals press and translates into money and metabolizes into power…

There is no shame In the C.O.E, there is only shame in “falling off”, fading. There is no compunction in the C.O.E. you can appropriate, you can out and out steal other artists’ work (as long as you have enough money silence or fight the law suit) there is not loyalty, there can be love, as long as it is with a standing member of the Church, or one that has no association with the Church but is allowing of its practices. The only expectation that you can have from a member is that you will be Entertained. You have not right to hold them to what they say today, whether it’s practicing a religion, supporting a foundation, charity or cause, even their rehabilitation or sobriety is up for grabs. With the mercurial shifts of the industries winds, boundaries, loyalties and values change with swift regularity. Just when we think we identify with them, that in some way they represent us, they shift and change. We then feel betrayed, having bought into what they were presenting, we believed them… that is because we are outsiders and we don’t know the rules of operation within the Church.

Make no mistake about it, Beyoncé is all about being the biggest, baddest, B on the planet. There is little she wouldn’t do to become that (which she has) or to maintain that. That is what the religion of Fame requires. Beyoncé is not a feminist, the laws of the Church that she serves will never allow her to prescribe to feminism or any other group, she can feign allegiance, or service, she can manipulate it, but in the Church of The Entertainer the doctrine is clear, “Thy shall serve no other God but Fame”.

 

Bulgarian 5×5+1 Project Preview!!!

f1d44a73a5dbb7369b4dd0f339da9ea9

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Well some of you that follow MBMI may well know that I was in Bulgaria for the Iliev Dance Arts Foundation’s Dance IT! intensive in April. The director and founder of the foundation Petur Iliev was in the process of building an evening of dance that would include Contemporary, Modern, Hip Hop and Folk dance as well as some original music for the works. He asked me if I would like to contribute and I jumped at the opportunity. The premise was that there would be 5 dancers, 5 musicians and a single wildcard at any time….

I choose my wild card to be another dancer, I just couldn’t choose! They were all so singular and interesting and so very willing. We had 2 weeks  and something like 12 hours to build it. At the end of the Dance It  Workshop we performed as much as we had which is what you will see in this clip…

“And so they retired…” is a dance miniature choreographer by Theresa Ruth Howard as part of the “5×5+1” artistic project of Petur Iliev and Iliev Dance Art Foundation.

This work explores the various elements in relationships: power, control, submission and dominance, sensuality, lust, and, the indifference that can lie between. Set in a Dream scape where partners intermingle exploring the emotional landscape of relationships when they are magnified by the heart, mind and the subconscious.

The video shows the work-in-progress performance of the piece at “Dance It!” 2014 Spring Intensive Program in Sofia, Bulgaria.

Original music: Viaggio by Lino Cannavacciuolo

Dancers: Ivo Adov, Kalina Vladimirova, Milena Abushinova, Stanislav Stefanov, Vasilena Shopova, Yanitsa Atanasova

 

More about “5×5+1” project at:
http://ilievdance.org/en/program/5×5/

 


I want to say a huge thank you to Petur Iliev, Rozilina, Tsveti, and Peter’s Angels for all of the help and support. It was a challenge, but it was great fun, mainly because everyone on the team was lovely…

And to my beautiful dancers…words can not express how much you mean to me. I had no idea what I was going to do, make, I had no music nothing, and from that first day in rehearsal YOU all made it happen, you were truly the inspiration. You with your desire to create and build something new, your determination, your drive, your willingness to run from one job, rehearsal, show to get to rehearsal and then run back… Thank you. Thank you for your laughter and sense of play in the studio, thank you for trusting me – even when you couldn’t understand me, and on a level that was probably better!! This piece is a gift to you, it is yours….Thank you again…..lovelovelove

Feminist bell hooks calls Beyoncé‘Terrorist’ Because of Her ‘Impact On Young Girls’

BellBey

Amen!!!! Finally. bell hooks is one of my living female icons and I am so happy that she has come and called it what it is…

Last night, The New School hosted a dynamic conversation between Black women activists and creatives titled “Are You Still a Slave?”

The group, which included filmmaker Shola Lynch, author Marci Blackman, feminist icon and scholar bell hooks, and activist and author Janet Mock, focused on the images of women of color in the media and what types of messages are sent to the public at large.

I see a part of Beyoncé that is in fact anti-feminist — that is a terrorist, especially in terms of the impact on young girls. I actually feel like the major of assault on feminism in our society has come from visual media, and from television, and videos. Just think, do we know of any powerful man of any color who’s come out with some tirade against feminism? The tirades against feminism occur so much in the image-making business, and what we see.

What I’m concerned about constantly in my critical imagination is why don’t we have libratory images that are away from, not an inversion of, what society has told us?

Hooks, argued Beyoncé’s sexy, partially-clothed Time cover did little to bolster her pro-woman bona fides.

“Let’s take the image of this super rich, very powerful Black female and let’s use it in the service of imperialist, white supremacist capitalist patriarchy because she probably had very little control over that cover — that image,“ the professor argued.

Hooks: Well, of course, I think that’s fantasy. I think it’s a fantasy that we can recoup the violating image and use it. I used to get so tired of people quoting Audre [Lorde], ‘The masters tools will never dismantle the master’s house.’ But that was exactly what she meant that you are not going to destroy this imperialist white supremacist capitalist patriarchy by creating your own version of it. Even if it serves you to make lots and lots of money.

I’ve really been challenging people to think about would we be at all interested in Beyoncé if she wasn’t so rich, because I don’t think you can separate her class power, and the wealth, from people’s fascination with her. That here is a young, Black woman who is so incredibly wealthy. And wealthy is what so many young people fantasize, dream about, sexualize, eroticize. And one could argue, even more than her body, it’s what that body stands for—the body of desire fulfilled that is wealth, fame, celebrity, all the things that so many people in our culture are lusting for, wanting.

If Beyoncé was a homeless woman who looked the same way, or a poor, down and out woman who looked the same way, would people be enchanted by her? Or is it the combination of all of those things that are at the heart of imperialist white supremacist capitalist patriarchy?

And I’ve been saying, people of color, we are so invested in white supremacy, it’s tragic. Lorraine Hansberry said it is the only form of extremism that should discredit us in the eyes of our children that we remain so invested.

 

Gabourey Sidibe Gloria awards speech –She might be an Asshole, but you have to love her!!!

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Just to be clear, Gabourey Sidibe called herself an asshole in her  speech at the Gloria awards. She credited said Assholery for her confidence and her ability to stand firmly in her self as the world tells her that she is nothing at all that it wants. She tells an eyeopening  story about a school Christmas party in 5th grade. She baked cookies but none of  her classmates took any because they did not like her, but not for what you think might be the “Obvious” reasons (shes too fat, or black or ugly) no she claims it was because she was an asshole:

So, okay, we’re back in fifth grade, and I just had been rejected by 28 kids in a row. And I was sitting alone at my desk, with an empty Ziplock bag, crumbs in my lap, and I was at this great party that I had waited for all week. I waited all week for this party that I wasn’t invited to. And for some reason I got up, I sat on my desk, and I partied my ass off. I laughed loudly when something funny happened. And when Miss Lowe put on music, I was one of the first ones to get up and dance. I joined the limbo, and ate chips, and drank soda, and I enjoyed myself, even though no one wanted me there. You know why? I told you — I was an asshole! I wanted that party! And what I want trumps what 28 people want me to do, especially when what they want me to do is leave. I had a great time. I did. And if I somehow ruined my classmates’ good time, then that’s on them. “How are you so confident?” “I’m an asshole!” Okay? It’s my good time, and my good life, despite what you think of me.

Now you sort of have to read the whole speech to really understand how poignant that statement is. Not that being an “asshole” is okay, but when you understand how and why she drew power and strength from it, it changes things a bit, at least it did for me. She is so inspirational- she might not like that I say because she challenges the media’s  constructs of what is beautiful, but also because she has such a clear and powerful voice, one that when you hear it you KNOW it is authentic. I recall the days when Star Jones was on The View and at her heaviest, she would always say how happy she was to be that big and how sexy she felt etc. But I never really bought it. It was the hard sell, almost as if by convincing her audience that she felt that way, she would convince herself….in the postscript we find that she was not only unhappy with the way she was but that it was putting her health at jeopardy and hence the surgery. When Gabourey speaks… she just speaks, she isn’t trying sell you anything, she doesn’t need too. She is comfortable in who she is, and it makes you—watching her comfortable with her as well. She is living her good life and you feel it. Read her full speech and get inspired!!

I’m so excited to be here. Really, really excited. Okay, I’ll get to it. Hi. One of the first things people usually ask me is, “Gabourey, how are you so confident?” I hate that. I always wonder if that’s the first thing they ask Rihanna when they meet her. “RiRi! How are you so confident?” Nope. No. No. But me? They ask me with that same incredulous disbelief every single time. “You seem so confident! How is that?”

When I was ten years, in the fifth grade, my teacher, Miss Lowe had announced that my class would be having a holiday party right before the Christmas break. She asked if we all could all bring snacks or soda or juice to the class party. She also said we had the option of cooking something, if we like. I was so excited. I immediately decided that I would make gingerbread cookies, and that everyone would love them. I told my mom my plan, and I asked her for money to go buy the ingredients. She thought I should just buy store-bought cookies, but I told her, “Those cookies didn’t have enough love in them!” I had to make the cookies. So I bought the mix, and I bought cookie cutters in the shape of Christmas trees and bells, and I made a practice batch of cookies that went horribly wrong. Good thing they were a practice batch. They were awful. And then the night before the party, I made another batch of cookies. And they were also awful, but they looked a lot better. I carefully put the cookies in a Ziplock bag, so I could take them to school the next day. When I got to school that morning, I could not wait until that party. And I was so proud of those cookies, and all the effort I put into making them, I started to think that maybe I wouldn’t just be the first woman black President — maybe I would also be a celebrity chef! I mean, why limit myself?

The party was set to take place during the last hour of school, and I waited excitedly for it all day long. Finally, it was party time. My teacher asked what everyone brought, and I proudly announced that I had baked cookies for the class. I think I felt prouder knowing that everyone else just bought stuff. I was the only one who made anything, because clearly, I’m a little more clever than anyone else. So as the party starts up, I walk around the class, proudly offering cookies to everyone. No one took a cookie. No one. No one except Nicholas, who was the first person I offered one to. But after a few of our other classmates set him straight, he actually caught up with me as I walked around the class, and gave the cookie back. I walked around the class trying to hand out cookies to my class, until I ended up back at my desk with the same amount of cookies that I started with. I sat at my desk alone, eating those gross gingerbread cookies that took hours to make, all by myself. I put chocolate chips in them, that’s why they were gross. I wasn’t surprised. I just forgot for a moment that my entire class hated me. I had zero friends from the fourth grade to the sixth grade. Who the hell was I baking cookies for? I really got so excited to bake that I had forgotten that everyone hated my guts. Why didn’t they like me? I was fat, yes. I had darker skin and weird hair, yes. But the truth is, this isn’t a story about bulling, or color, or weight. They hated me because… I was an asshole!

Yep. I was a bossy, bossy asshole. See, remember when I said that I thought I was more clever than everyone else? Well, I did! And I told them that — every single day! Those kids couldn’t get a word in edgewise, without me cutting them off to remind them that I was smarter, funnier, and all around wittier than them. I was always sarcastic — I called it my birth defect. And let’s face it, kids don’t get sarcasm. They don’t appreciate it. They never knew what I was talking about. And when they would say, “Wait… huh?” I would say, “My God, Alicia, read a book!” I know. I spoke differently than them, I just did. I sounded more like a Valley Girl than a Brooklyn girl. My classmates always asked me if I was adopted by white people. I’d say, “No. Both my parents went to college.” I know that was rude, but I’m still really proud of that. To be fair, in my neighborhood, not everyone’s parents had the opportunity to go to college. Most of my classmates’ parents were teens when they had them. My parents had me at age 30. My father was born in Senegal. His father was the mayor of the capital city, Dakar, and my dad often took my brother and I back home with him to visit Africa, while most of my classmates had never stepped out of the Lower East Side. My mother was a teacher in high school, that’s why I went there, but my mom also had a voice, so when I was nine, she quit her teaching job to go sing in the subway. She actually made more money as a singer for tips than she made as a teacher! I know! And she was quickly becoming the underground version of Whitney Houston. She was the strongest, smartest, and most talented person I had ever known. Even today, I don’t want to grow up to be anyone as much as I want to grow up to be her. I know!

The point is, I was a snob. I thought I was better than the kids in my class, and I let them know it. That’s why they didn’t like me. I think the reason I thought so highly of myself all the time was because no one else ever did. I figured out I was smart because my mother would yell at my older brother. She’d say, “Your little sister is going to pass you in school. You’re going to get left behind and she’s going to graduate before you.” But she never said to me, “You are smart.” What she did say was, “You are too fat.” I got the message that I wasn’t pretty, and I probably wasn’t normal, but I was smart! Why wouldn’t they just say that? “You’re smart.” It’s actually not that hard. My dad would yell at my brother, “Gabourey does her homework by herself! Why can’t you?” But he never said to me, “Good job.” What he did say was, “You need to lose weight so I can be proud of you.” I know. So I got made fun of at school, I got made fun of at home too, my older brother hated me, my dad just didn’t understand me, and my mom, who had been a fat girl at my age herself, understood me perfectly … but she berated me because she was so afraid of what she knew was to come for me. So I never felt safe when I was at home. And my response was always to eat more, because nothing says, “You hurt my feelings. Fuck you!” like eating a delicious cookie. Cookies never hurt me.

“Gabourey, how are you so confident?” It’s not easy. It’s hard to get dressed up for award shows and red carpets when I know I will be made fun of because of my weight. There’s always a big chance if I wear purple, I will be compared to Barney. If I wear white, a frozen turkey. And if I wear red, that pitcher of Kool-Aid that says, “Oh, yeah!” Twitter will blow up with nasty comments about how the recent earthquake was caused by me running to a hot dog cart or something. And “Diet or Die?” [She gives the finger to that] This is what I deal with every time I put on a dress. This is what I deal with every time someone takes a picture of me. Sometimes when I’m being interviewed by a fashion reporter, I can see it in her eyes, “How is she getting away with this? Why is she so confident? How does she deal with that body? Oh my God, I’m going to catch fat!”

What I would say, is my mom moved my brother and I to my aunt’s house. Her name is Dorothy Pitman Hughes, she is a feminist, an activist, and a lifelong friend of Gloria Steinem. Every day, I had to get up and go to school where everyone made fun of me, and I had to go home to where everyone made fun of me. Every day was hard to get going, no matter which direction I went. And on my way out of the house, I found strength. In the morning on the way out to the world, I passed by a portrait of my aunt and Gloria together. Side by side they stood, one with long beautiful hair and one with the most beautiful, round, Afro hair I had ever seen, both with their fists held high in the air. Powerful. Confident. And every day as I would leave the house… I would give that photo a fist right back. And I’d march off into battle. [She starts crying] I didn’t know that I was being inspired then. On my way home, I’d walk back up those stairs, I’d give that photo the fist again, and continue my march back in for more battle. [She pulls a tissue from her cleavage and dabs her eyes] That’s what boobs are for! I didn’t know I was being inspired then, but I was. If they could feel like that, maybe I could! I just wanted to look that cool. But it made me feel that strong.

So, okay, we’re back in fifth grade, and I just had been rejected by 28 kids in a row. And I was sitting alone at my desk, with an empty Ziplock bag, crumbs in my lap, and I was at this great party that I had waited for all week. I waited all week for this party that I wasn’t invited to. And for some reason I got up, I sat on my desk, and I partied my ass off. I laughed loudly when something funny happened. And when Miss Lowe put on music, I was one of the first ones to get up and dance. I joined the limbo, and ate chips, and drank soda, and I enjoyed myself, even though no one wanted me there. You know why? I told you — I was an asshole! I wanted that party! And what I want trumps what 28 people want me to do, especially when what they want me to do is leave. I had a great time. I did. And if I somehow ruined my classmates’ good time, then that’s on them. “How are you so confident?” “I’m an asshole!” Okay? It’s my good time, and my good life, despite what you think of me. I live my life, because I dare. I dare to show up when everyone else might hide their faces and hide their bodies in shame. I show up because I’m an asshole, and I want to have a good time. And my mother and my father love me. They wanted the best life for me, and they didn’t know how to verbalize it. And I get it. I really do. They were better parents to me than they had themselves. I’m grateful to them, and to my fifth grade class, because if they hadn’t made me cry, I wouldn’t be able to cry on cue now. [Dabs tears] If I hadn’t been told I was garbage, I wouldn’t have learned how to show people I’m talented. And if everyone had always laughed at my jokes, I wouldn’t have figured out how to be so funny. If they hadn’t told me I was ugly, I never would have searched for my beauty. And if they hadn’t tried to break me down, I wouldn’t know that I’m unbreakable. [Dabs tears] So when you ask me how I’m so confident, I know what you’re really asking me: how could someone like me be confident? Go ask Rihanna, asshole!

This Is What Happens When You Tell A Young Girl She’s Fat

Hosted by Huffington Post

LITTLE GIRL MIRROR

 

 

Young girls who grow up being told they’re “too fat” have a greater chance of becoming obese.

That’s according to a new long-term study by psychology researchers at UCLA. Researchers weighed girls at age 10 and again at age 19, and found that the odds of being obese as a young woman increased if someone had labeled the participant “too fat” by the time she was 10. They also found a participant’s likelihood of being obese increased as more people told her she was “too fat.”

“There’s no reason to even say the ‘f’ word if you’re trying to improve health,” lead researcher A. Janet Tomiyama told The Huffington Post. “This really adds to a body of research that shows that negatively evaluating someone, especially in the weight domain, can sometimes backfire.”

Researchers measured the weights and heights of 2,379 10-year-old girls from Northern California; Cincinnati, Ohio; and Washington, D.C., and asked them if anyone had ever told them they were too fat (58 percent said yes). The researchers followed up with the participants at age 19 — nine years later — to again record their heights and weights. They found that the women had 1.66 times greater odds of being obese if people (including parents, teachers, siblings and friends) had told them that they were “too fat” while growing up.

Tomiyama statistically removed the effects of childhood weight, income, race and puberty age in order to isolate the impact of “fat” comments. The study was published online Monday for the June 2014 print issue of JAMA Pediatrics.

Tomiyama said the findings echo other research she’s done on how people respond to stress by eating more.

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Science Shows Men Like Women With Less Makeup

I find the timing of this article ironic considering the  fact that yesterday I left my makeup bag at home when I was planning to spend the night out of the city. I was so utterly annoyed I was frantically thinking of ways of doubling back to my house to get it before my class or the bus to New Jersey. The odd thing was, I was not at the time wearing makeup. I had been fresh faced for a number of days and was completely fine with it, however the idea of not being able to jush up my look with a bit of foundation, blush and mascara gave me anxiety. Personally I think I look much better, more polished with a bit of war paint on, just some powder, mascara and lipstick can change my whole face (at least in my view) without it I feel sullen and washed out, I look tired….

Well apparently there is scientific proof that at least men prefer women with less makeup on:

New research published in the Quarterly Journal of Experimental Psychology found that people’s perceptions of what men and women find attractive are off. And even though many women decide to wear makeup to make themselves “more” attractive, they may be overdoing it.

Researchers at Bangor University and Aberdeen University gave 44 women different types of foundation, lipstick, blush and mascara and then told them to put on makeup like they were going on a night out. The women were photographed before and after they put on any makeup. The researchers then altered the photographs so they had a range of 21 images of the women wearing various amounts of makeup.

The images were then shown to 44 Bangor University students, who were told to pick the photo that they thought was the most attractive, the photo they thought women would prefer and the photo men would prefer.

The image below is an example of the before and after makeup images.

Courtesy of Alex Lee Jones

The image below is an example of the series of images from less to more makeup.

Courtesy of Alex Lee Jones

Interestingly, the women liked images of the models wearing a bit more makeup than the men did. All of the participants assumed men would like the models with more makeup on than the women would, but that turned out to be untrue. Men and women both preferred the images of the models wearing 40% less makeup than they initially put on.

The researchers conclude that women are putting on makeup for a perceived standard of beauty that may not actually exist. “Taken together, these results suggest that women are likely wearing cosmetics to appeal to the mistaken preferences of others. These mistaken preferences seem more tied to the perceived expectancies of men, and, to a lesser degree, of women,” the authors wrote.

 

Ok My  only issue with this is, that it assumes that I, or women are using makeup to attract, or appeal to men, and personally for me that is not the case, and I would venture to bet that it is not the case for a great deal of women. It is a proven fact that women dress more for the approval of other women, and not to attract men. Where it is nice to know that in a blind test (meaning it’s not your boyfriend, or husband trying to get you out the door) that men find the natural beauty of women more appealing, the real question is how do we convince the women of this?!

Does a Fitness Instuctor Have to LOOK the PART?

How important is it to you that your trainers, instructors (yoga, spin, pilates) look a certain way? Do you expect them to be ripped and lean? Should they have never tasted a carb or sugar, or had a glass of wine? Or can they look like average “normal” bodied people who work out are in good shape and do a good job at working you out?

I have to admit I do have a prejudice, I do like for the people who are in front of me instructing me on fitness to look a certain way. I’ll admit it! May the fire and brimstone of hell nip at the edges of my yoga mat!!! But I have a reason. There is something to being able to look at the person who is leading you through this torture and see that they obviously go through it too and on some level have mastered it. Whether they should or not, they do at times serve as an inspiration. It’s a lot of pressure but I really am one for walking the talk not just talking the crap! I want them to look like it’s their life- it’s not data processing- fitness is a lifestyle and in my mind if you live a certain lifestyle things reflect that. Is that wrong? I’m not saying you have to be skinny but you should look like you do what you are making me do!

Trust me I feel the same way about dance instructors to a certain degree (barring age) the trained body has a certain look and carriage- it may be larger or very petite but you can see the knowledge in a person’s movements even when they are eighty you can tell what that body was capable of when it was 20. Personally I fall somewhere in the middle of that age spectrum and my body cannot execute all things anymore, and I know there are students who still want to see that leg jacked up there, or the foot hooked, or 5 pirouettes and it happens less and less these days but I feel it my responsibility to embody the spirit of the dancing dancer as much as possible. Now I have had some perfectly round ballet teachers in my day and I learned just as much from them as thin ones but then again dance is about art and technique where the world of fitness is about – well fitness! Should you not look the part?

We associate being over weight with being lazy and gluttonous and thin with being fit – in “Shape” or healthy and that is not the case at all the two are not synonymous. As a Bikram practitioner I see many students who started off over weight and even obese, practicing for a length of time and then going to training to become a teacher- they are substantially smaller then when they began practicing but do not have the tight Speedo bodies that are often associated with yoga and particularly the scantily clad Bikram practice, but they have and do walk the walk. Having witnessed their journey from former couch potato to Bikram instructor I have a new appreciation for that process and for the body standing in front of me to instruct, however I would be lying if (outside of knowing someone’s personal story) I said I didn’t have an expectation.

In this process of Blogging I have had to expose and examine some of these ideas and hidden beliefs and value systems. I try not to judge them as much as ask how they got there first place? and do I want to hold on to them? Then I have to believe that I cannot be alone in having thoughts like this and so I bring it now to you. Is it “Right” or “reasonable” to expect our fitness leaders (trainers, instructors, nutritionist etc.) to physically reflect their philosophy? Or should they be allowed to, like us have “flaws” a little extra here and there as long as they are capable of doing their jobs? (i.e. working us out, giving a good class, supplying accurate information) or is the look a part of their job? It is in dance- but not so much for dance instruction.

This is a topic that goes through our heads and we talk about after we leave the gym, or yoga studio, we comment on how this instructor talks about how you should do this exercise for your abs while her stomach is hanging out. We note if they have put on weight, or if we bump into them on the street and they are having a coffee and talk about the ravages of caffeine on the system as we lie in shavasana. We do have an opinion- and note that is a kind way of saying judgment but the question not do we (‘Cause we do!) the question is SHOULD WE?

When I feel Best

The time when I feel best about myself is often in the safety of my solitude.
There, alone in the stillness of myself the frenetic chaos of the world is muted,
And my voice, my quiet truth can be heard in the distance- Not so far away.
Alone, without the cacophony of talking heads from electronic boxes making promises like a soon to be unfaithful lover I can find my peace.
There in that space I can settle in to the certainty of my frame and know that it is home- safe, warm and mine.
My personal space on this planet, not always neat and tidy or perfectly aligned, nor has its naturalness been manicured away in the fruitless endeavor to be more or less in the hopes of being something better.
But it is home and it is enough.

Mindy Kaling on being a “Chubby” woman in Hollywood and Body Shaming

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Mindy Kaling has broken barriers in Hollywood, she is the first Indian American woman to produce, write, and star in a hit television show while being brown and chubby. In the society we live in it is unfortunate, but understandable that her appearance would be attacked. While saying that she is brilliant and scathingly funny on one had, her weight and shape has been fodder for unkind and tactless comments. Well never challenge a smart, witty and courageous woman and think that she won’t come back at you. recently on the Jimmy Kimmel show she had some interesting things to say to her detractors. check it out!

First of all I think that she looked great in that outfit, ironically that top is just like the tops worn with saris the traditional Indian dress… that women of all body types wear in her culture…. And I thought that her comments about what people think of her and what her lifestyle must be because she has meat on her bones (being glued to a couch) is hysterical. I love that she admitted that it takes her a great deal of effort to maintain her size. People forget that just because you eat a certain way and work out, it doesn’t mean that you will be, or are even meant to be a size 2!!

Rock on! Girl Power, not WOMAN power!!