Category Archives: About My Body My Image

Another Example of What’s Wrong in the World (day 2) What not to bring to a Baby Shower..

The other day I brought you Kat Von D’s  ill-titled “Underage red” lipstick shade being sold in Sephora beauty stores, and today it’s a company called Wry Baby (love the irony, it’s not lost here) and their onesie that reads “I hate my thighs”... Really ya’ll Yeah Yeah I get it’s a joke, and it pokes fun at how women are neurotic about their bodies without cause, and how silly it is that a BABY would worry about the size of their thighs but there is something icky about it. Like that lipstick shade….There is a sort of projection that no matter how ironic need not be perpetuated further, not even jokingly. There really are older men who are looking at underage girls and thinking inappropriate things, and before that little wee one grows out of that onesie she will no doubt hear her mother hating on her body. “I’m so fat, I have to loose this weight”,  “Ugh I’ll never get my stomach back” , “My hips are so wide”,  “My tits look like something in National Geographic” (all things I have heard post pregnant women say by the way”. Before that child can comprehend what her body is, what a wonder it is, how amazingly formed and perfect it is, she learned that is is cursed, and she is wearing a onesie that encourages people to laugh bend over and pinch her thighs…

I would like to say that in the above assumed that mothers would be buying this for their baby girls, and where it is possible that some might buy it for their little boys, it is clearly marketed at women and our body self-debasing mentality. perhaps I would feel better if there was a onesie that read

“I have a small pecker, so one day I’ll drive my dad’s sports car”

If we we believe that babies can hear in utero , so much so that mothers play music and language tapes to their bellies, because somehow, swimming around in all the amniotic fluid they take it in, why then do we not believe that once they are here in this world that such things don’t register? Just saying… it’s something to think about when you are fashionably, branding your baby with ironic phrases…

Here was Wry Babies answer to the back lash…pokg52fpc0

 

They’ve pitted “thighs” against another design reading, “Love me for my leg rolls.”  and are letting the sales decide how upset people REALLY are…All proceeds from either design will go to the Ms. Foundation for Women.

 

 

 

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Me and Andie

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Kathy Griffin Quits Fashion Police, Could this mark the END?

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So  E’s Fashion Police seems to be the Titanic of Shows. Things have gone from bad to worse in less than 2 weeks. First there was Guiliana Rancic’s tasteless comment about Zendaya’s hair at the Oscars, the result of which caused such a dust up from talk show hosts, other stars and the internet that Rancic had to issue a taped apology (Paula Dean style) to subdue the fury. Her fellow co-host Kelly Osbourne wasn’t having it either, she apparently repeatedly warned against the comment aimed at her friend (but was ignored) later that week she up and quit. Now not even a week later Kathy Griffin, the replacement to Joan Rivers has given up the ghost, stating that she thinks that the show is “to mean” and bashes people out of “context”.

Where I will give a hooray (albeit a short one) for her stance, I have to say, “Did you not watch the show before you signed on?” The premise for Fashion Police from the onset was a seated version of E’s2000-2003 red carpet show  Joan Rivers (toting along Melissa) . Then their critiques were caustic, mean spirited and hurtful. Who can forget the glib comment Rivers made about a floppy hat then VeeJay Karen Duff. Duff wore the hat because her hair had begun to fall due to a rare disease called sarcoidosis. An overstep that at the time caused backlash such that at the time many celebrities worked to avoid them on the carpet. Fashion Police became the re-imagined version, they took to the studio and used footage and pics to have at their prey. There are two things the has always struck me as peculiar about this set up, the first is that Rancid has always done red carpet coverage, and has fawned and cooed over celebrities their outfits, nails, jewels and bodies, now she was required to oh and ah to their faces and then retreat back to a studio where she could from a safe distance rip them to shreds.

The second thing I find odd is that you here you have three women who all have been highly criticized for their looks, Joan before surgery was always thought to be unattractive which prompted her obsession with plastic surgery which we can all agree (as she would) went a bit too far, Kelly Osbourne was the fat girl who masked not being attractive with wild hair and make up until she lost weight and started to fit in, and then began dressing in couture, and Rancic whose weight or lack there of has always placed her under scrutiny. It is a popular belief that she has some struggles with a possible eating disorder/ or disordered eating. The topic was highlighted when she and her husband did their reality series and she was traumatized when the doctor told her that in order to increase her chances of having a child she would have to gain weight. despite wanting a child she was torn about gaining weight her husband even asked if she was going be able to do it… So there they would sit like jackals at one end of the high school hallway and talk trash about people, mostly women who by all accounts were close to the worlds concept of “Ideal”. It was clear that the concept of the show was a glammed up Mean Girls (Cue Tina Fey in the Gym).

So forgive me if my applause for Griffin is short lived, one has to ask, “What did you think was going to happen when they said action?”. I can see where her comedic integrity was being compromised. Her comedy is about context, she can take the piss out of the Kardashians because they make it easy and there are so many contradictions they present. In her act she has never gone after Oprah for her physical weight, but more her weight of power and influence, so I can see where reading someone for the color or cut of a dress not flattering them or wearing the wrong eye make-up might send up a flag, but still, you had to know…

I hope that this marks the end of the show or at least a restructuring of it. Perhaps they will enlist actual experts…that would be a change! Perhaps a designer a make-artist and a hair stylist, at least then we as viewers could respect their opinions and learn a thing or two.

All in all I am still hoping that one day will move away from the senseless judging of women, their bodies and their personal style, (or that of their professional stylists). Perhaps we can move to a place where women are not reduced to being object that exist to please others with their appearance alone. With the I have to say I am not holding out hope, after all it’s still Hollywood.

When a Bad Body Image and Low Self-Esteem can be DEADLY

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Paige Winslow known as “The Black Madame”  is standing trial in Philadelphia for the death of a woman who came to her for butt injections. Winslow (who is not a licensed doctor) Injected the woman in a hotel bathroom in a South Philadelphia hotel. She claimed to be helping women who suffer from low self esteem. She calls herself “The Fairy God Mother”

She claim that Kanye West brought his then girl friend Amber Rose to her for injections which put her on the celebrity scene. She also claims that Nikki Minaj was going to come in for a “correction”.

I have to ask, is it worth it? not just the low end (and clearly deadly) two grand, but the risking of one’s life to have a bigger booty? I take the stance of not judging those who decide to undergo such procedures but if you are, then make certain that you are going to a licensed doctor, and someone who does not use CRAZY GLUE as sutures!! Also a clue that your doctor is a hack…or not a doctor at all, having a procedure in a hotel room, and seeing things like cement mix and fix-a flat in their black bag.

Ladies,  like the saying goes, a mind is a terrible thing to waste so is a life, a healthy body and a future. A bigger butt, breast, lips or flatter tummy is not worth your life!! Learning to love yourself might take a bit longer to master, but it is healthier, lasts longer and only has positive side effects!!

In this case the Black Madame was more a Black Widow….

Does a Fitness Instuctor Have to LOOK the PART?

How important is it to you that your trainers, instructors (yoga, spin, pilates) look a certain way? Do you expect them to be ripped and lean? Should they have never tasted a carb or sugar, or had a glass of wine? Or can they look like average “normal” bodied people who work out are in good shape and do a good job at working you out?

I have to admit I do have a prejudice, I do like for the people who are in front of me instructing me on fitness to look a certain way. I’ll admit it! May the fire and brimstone of hell nip at the edges of my yoga mat!!! But I have a reason. There is something to being able to look at the person who is leading you through this torture and see that they obviously go through it too and on some level have mastered it. Whether they should or not, they do at times serve as an inspiration. It’s a lot of pressure but I really am one for walking the talk not just talking the crap! I want them to look like it’s their life- it’s not data processing- fitness is a lifestyle and in my mind if you live a certain lifestyle things reflect that. Is that wrong? I’m not saying you have to be skinny but you should look like you do what you are making me do!

Trust me I feel the same way about dance instructors to a certain degree (barring age) the trained body has a certain look and carriage- it may be larger or very petite but you can see the knowledge in a person’s movements even when they are eighty you can tell what that body was capable of when it was 20. Personally I fall somewhere in the middle of that age spectrum and my body cannot execute all things anymore, and I know there are students who still want to see that leg jacked up there, or the foot hooked, or 5 pirouettes and it happens less and less these days but I feel it my responsibility to embody the spirit of the dancing dancer as much as possible. Now I have had some perfectly round ballet teachers in my day and I learned just as much from them as thin ones but then again dance is about art and technique where the world of fitness is about – well fitness! Should you not look the part?

We associate being over weight with being lazy and gluttonous and thin with being fit – in “Shape” or healthy and that is not the case at all the two are not synonymous. As a Bikram practitioner I see many students who started off over weight and even obese, practicing for a length of time and then going to training to become a teacher- they are substantially smaller then when they began practicing but do not have the tight Speedo bodies that are often associated with yoga and particularly the scantily clad Bikram practice, but they have and do walk the walk. Having witnessed their journey from former couch potato to Bikram instructor I have a new appreciation for that process and for the body standing in front of me to instruct, however I would be lying if (outside of knowing someone’s personal story) I said I didn’t have an expectation.

In this process of Blogging I have had to expose and examine some of these ideas and hidden beliefs and value systems. I try not to judge them as much as ask how they got there first place? and do I want to hold on to them? Then I have to believe that I cannot be alone in having thoughts like this and so I bring it now to you. Is it “Right” or “reasonable” to expect our fitness leaders (trainers, instructors, nutritionist etc.) to physically reflect their philosophy? Or should they be allowed to, like us have “flaws” a little extra here and there as long as they are capable of doing their jobs? (i.e. working us out, giving a good class, supplying accurate information) or is the look a part of their job? It is in dance- but not so much for dance instruction.

This is a topic that goes through our heads and we talk about after we leave the gym, or yoga studio, we comment on how this instructor talks about how you should do this exercise for your abs while her stomach is hanging out. We note if they have put on weight, or if we bump into them on the street and they are having a coffee and talk about the ravages of caffeine on the system as we lie in shavasana. We do have an opinion- and note that is a kind way of saying judgment but the question not do we (‘Cause we do!) the question is SHOULD WE?

What’s the Point?

If you know anything about me you’ll know that I am honest, forthright and I hate BS!

I got annoyed!
In the media there are no real conversations about the body or the images we hold of them, oh yeah there is talk- chatter but honest conversation not so much…Instead it’s always someone trying to sell you something: a product, a belief, a lifestyle that amounts to a pipe dream.

Buy this! – Wear that! Eat these and it will make you look like the image we are projecting (which has been digitally altered and bares no resemblance to a human being at all)

The body has been commercialized.

That commercialization has many us twisted and feeling horribly inadequate- you are never enough! young, thin, tall, rich, smart, blonde, or nowadays naked (publicly).

I wanted to create a place where we can discuss the body the way we do with our girlfriends on the telephone, with our mothers and sisters over the kitchen table, With our partner and lovers in the dressing rooms of clothing stores and with ourselves in our heads! (Sometimes it’s best conversation you can get). I wanted to create a place where women and men alike can realize that they are not alone in their feelings of confusion (as to where they fit or what to be) or frustration (at not being at all what they truly want to be). I wanted for all us to have that collective “somebody” to say, “You’re all right?” – “It’s ok” – “I know” or sometimes “Shut up- and eat that cake!” Because sometimes- what you have – ain’t what you want – but it’s better than nothing, so, we have to learn how to accept and appreciate what we do have because we are all fabulous by design- and fabulous starts in the mind!!

My Body My Image is your body, my body, our Bodies let’s redefine and Re- fine Our Image- together!!!